Valentine's Day was a bomb at cafe cartel today me being the cashier...almost at the point of screwing up... it was extremely exhausting i had to work for the entire day truly sad because i just found out the significance of this day how much love ,happiness and hope i discovered i was distraught because i was supposed to be pending this very special day with my love but it turns out that i was careless therefore resulted me to working 2 shifts my boss told me money was important then my bf well i've been deluding myself lately convincing myself that it was true who am i kidding ? but the end of the day i realize how much it hurts not spending this special day with him it hurt till it brought me to tears on my way home i truly regretted it suddenly my bosses theory mad me feel absolutely isolated it was because of my job that i'm not going out with friends that i feel loveless ust a machine working working working that was when i realized that it sting so badly i was neglecting myself and others i feel way terrible all this while i've been in self denial thinking that money is important till you lose the people you love one by one
i was thinking my boyfriend told me h couldn't get me flowers or anything because he father confiscated his cash i was doubtful,could it be an excuse? i realized that valentine's day was an important day because i was longing for someone to express their love to me for the past few years and failed non have not even this year no roses no bears no nothing just me all alone i just realize how lonely i am it's so heart wrenching i hate being alone then my boyfriend wanted to send a poem by text messaging me but it was cut off because my inbox was full but i was too late to realize it because he went to sleep so the feeling of valentine's was gone distraught finally engulf me with pain and distress the meaning of today has vanish sunday wouldn't seem special anymore because the feeling is gone how truly sad it was because my boyfriend couldn't be bothered he just gave me some lousy excuse and i was worrying so much we barely meet anymore or go out frequently i'm hanging on a string here it's like he just spends no effort... we barely keep much contact since he has school here i am trying to convince myself it's ok but it isn't!!! here i am struggling because he's so damn thick and oblivious it's just so hard...because i do everything because of him i let it go because it's him i think of him all the time i'm motivated by it here i am not sure what the heck he's thinking about at all whether his angry or jealous or happy whatever i'm clueless distraught would be an understatement
11:47 PM
Artsy Tartsy
Every month I'd post different photos
Profile
F**K THAT
I'm just crazy alright?
Me...
18...not that you should care ,
but it's the basics to actually know my age
My cats are gorgeous and shall rule the world!
I LOVE CATS!!!...
Halloween baby
technically I can't be bothered with the opposite sex trying to hit on me now...
Life is going to be spectacular this year and i can feel it, told you i'd change when i'm 18... what am i talking
about life has been and always will be crazy
